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"Smell is a potent wizard that transports you across thousands of miles and all the years you have lived. The odors of fruits waft me to my southern home, to my childhood frolics in the peach orchard. Other odors, instantaneous and fleeting, cause my heart to dilate joyously or contract with remembered grief." Helen Keller

"Add sensory detail!" may be the most simple, and some would say obvious, command a writing teacher gives a student. But like everything else involving great writing it can be more complicated than that.

This week we'll explore sensory detail beyond the basics. How does the right sensory detail build voice? What effects can you create by describing smell, taste, touch, sound and the old standby what your point of view character sees? Do different readers perceive sensory detail differently? How do you avoid sensory overload?

Today let's start with why include sensory detail.
 
Janet Burroway, guru writing professor says ""Specific, definite, concrete, particular details--these are the life of fiction....(W)riting is alive because we do in fact live through our sense perceptions..." (From Writing Fiction A Guide To Narrative Craft)

Adding sensory details- the sites and sounds and smells are at the root of that other basic piece of writing advice- SHOW DON'T TELL. Put yourself in the point of view character's shoes. Bring him into the room and let him discover the smell of chalk on a chalkboard or a pan of  beans burned on a stove.

Let him hear a crying baby or a whimpering dog.

But this doesn't mean adding something like "Alfonso heard a mouse scurry under the table." That's still telling. Not horrible. Even okay sometimes. But that's not the best you can do. Try something like this-

"Alfonso dragged the chair from under the table and fell into its seat. A quiet gnawing, tiny claws across the floorboards, maybe, scurried from the dark corner beneath his feet. Alfonso pushed his plate to the middle of the table. He was never sure if he was alone in this kitchen." 

Okay, fine. I just made that example up on the spot. It's sort of silly and not the most elegant... but do you get my drift? Sensory detail shouldn't sit on top a scene like a cherry on a scoop of ice cream. Sensory detail that pulls a reader in is itself embedded into the scene. You are showing what sounds Alfonso heard, inserting those very sounds into your reader's ears, not merely reporting that there were sounds in the room.

Sensory detail is an arrow that shoots through a page, piercing a reader's heart and memory. How do you feel, suspecting there's a mouse under Alfonso's feet? Would you eat a slice of bread or a hunk of cheese from that kitchen? It probably doesn't matter to the plot of this imaginary story whether there are actually mice in the kitchen. It does matter that the kitchen has an unsettling atmosphere.
 

I constantly read tons of fiction, but lately I've been working my way through a hardcore work of nonfiction, too.

Dreaming By The Book by Elaine Scarry.
 

Scarry, a Harvard aesthetics professor, explains how reading creates an intense sensory response in the reader. In many ways- measurable with neurological and psychological tools- a reader's response to a story on the page is stronger than his reaction to dreams or imagination. Writers who use powerful description and compelling characterization create vivid worlds the reader believes in. How many times have you cried over a novel, even though the rational part of you knows it's all make believe?

One of the most essential tools of this world-building is concrete sensory detail. When Helen Keller read about the smell of a peach she was carried to another place and time. She fell into the dream of the story. You can do this too, with well written sensory details.

Tomorrow we'll talk about the what of sensory detail... making sure our literary smells and tastes are neither too hot nor too cold, but always just right.

This week I've been talking about finishing a novel, the trials, tribulations, doubts and (occasional) triumphs you may experience along the way. 

I try to

            avoid dead ends

and

            never lose faith

and

            stay in touch with the storyline and the inner life of my characters.

This last item is critical. In fact, it's what I'm focused on today.  When I look at my

work-in-progress, I need to ask myself if I really understand what's going on inside my main character's head through the last twenty pages of the novel.

You need somehow to separate yourself from the process of creation long enough to read the thing with an objective eye.  Okay. I know it is impossible to totally separate yourself from a story that came out of your own head, but you need to obtain as much distance as you can to judge if the story works.  

Here are some things to consider:

            1. Look at transitions. – Are there places in which the reader may wonder how the character has moved from the end of one chapter to the beginning of another?

            2. In the process of revising, have you perhaps, inadvertently, dropped a critical piece of information whose absence now creates a gaping hole? (This is where trusted readers provide invaluable assistance.)

            3. If you are happy with your work, send it out! (quickly, before that nasty inner voice start whining about something that is really okay.  Leave it alone. Let go!)

Thank you for reading this week. I wish you all a smooth ride to a happy ending!

Writing a novel requires a leap of faith. I mean, when you think about it, you have to wonder what would make a person undertake such an endeavor. When I think about it, visions of Bette Davis in the film, All About Eve, come to mind, that scene when she delivers that now-infamous line. Downing a martini and pausing on the stairs, she says:

"Fasten your seatbelts. It's going to be a bumpy night."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Eg-ckMup6SI&feature=related

Ah yes. Bumpy now and bumpier still as the journey proceeds. Who knows where it may lead.  

Part of the addiction of writing, (and I do believe it is an addiction), must be the fascination of seeing how the journey unfolds, of discovering where it takes you. 

I've already mentioned a couple of circuitous-path-to-completion stories. Here is another tale of the twists and turns behind the writing of a novel, a Newbery winner this time, one of my favorites, Walk Two Moons by Sharon Creech.

In her Newbery speech, Creech said that, before writing the final manuscript of what became, Walk Two Moons, she had written two earlier versions of the book, neither of which included Salamanca or the Hiddles. In an on-line discussion on CCBC-Net back in 1995, Creech said that the first version was a humorous sequel to Absolutely Normal Chaos. Mary Lou Finney was a central character in the plot. And look how that changed. 

Creech credits much of this change to finding a message in a fortune cookie at a Chinese restaurant. "Don't judge a man until you've walked two moons in his moccasins." Beneath the message, (Creech says in her Newbery speech), was the note, "American Indian proverb." Reading that message and the note which accompanied it, led Creech to remember a trip her family had taken across the United States from Ohio to Lewiston, Idaho in 1957. "...I remember it not only as a literal and physical journey across America," she writes, "but also as a metaphorical journey; it was a time when I was enriched and inspired by our vast country and all the various people who populate it. There was a larger, lush and complex world outside my own."  

 All of these thoughts swirled around in Creech's head and sent her off in a new direction. Salamanca Hiddle came into her story. And there was a girl named Phoebe Winterbottom. To fully appreciate this story-behind-the-story, I commend Creech's speech to you. It can be found in the July-August, 1995 issue of The Horn Book, or you may read it in a collection of Newbery and Caldecott speeches published by the American Library Association, The Newbery & Caldecott Books, 1986-2000. I cannot recommend this collection highly enough. There are riches here. Seeing the process through the eyes of another writer helps you understand your own process. I feel more comfortable about what's going on here on my own computer screen, when I learn about how others have encountered false leads and circled around and doubled back before completing a novel.  

Creech started out with a story about one main character. Then the main character changed and the story evolved and it became something very different from what she had first imagined. Last week, I deleted a character whom I had grown to love. I took him out completely. He no longer fits as the story has evolved. He now resides only in digital files labeled "previous drafts."  

All humans crave stories and perhaps writers crave stories about writing stories more than others. I don't know. What we're after is understanding. Or, at least, that's part of the quest. Fellow Tollboother Kelly Bingham reminded me yesterday in her note that, "at some point, you have to let it go." How right she is. I am thinking of that today as I struggle with the final pages of my manuscript. 

            Thanks, Kelly. I needed that.

What journey are you on now? What twists and turns have you taken along the way?

Is it time to let it go?

Happy Weekend everyone.. 

I'm taking time out for a special message:

We're celebrating here at The Tollbooth.  We received news earlier this week that our site has been included on the list at

"100 Best Book Blogs for Kids, Tweens, and Teens"

The list is broken down into eight categories from Picture Books and Younger Readers to Teens and Tweens and Young Adult to Well-Rounded Book Blogs to Multi-Cultural Book Blogs to Poetry to From and For the Professionals.... that's our category. There are also categories for Graphic Novels and Comic Books and Children's and Adult Literature. 

What a terrific resource. We're proud as punch to be included

 
Here's the link:

(http://onlineschool.net/2009/10/27/100-best-book-blogs-for-kids-tweens-and-teens/).

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Conquer Writer's Block

1. I find it easier to stand up for other people, and i wouldn't let it slide if they made a rude or hurtful comment.
2. Usually if a friend makes a racist or homophobic remark, I tend to let it slide. I think that while i would not say such things myself, I have no right to censor those around me.
3. This happens all of the time. I confront some relatives, but I refuse to if they are drunk or watch Fox News.
4. I'd let it slide if it was just a private remark... As much as I despise bigotry and intolerance, I know that you can't change people-they have to change themselves ...
5. Confront! confront! confront! Politely, but without equivocation.
6. SPEAK UP. Always, always, always speak up. Letting something slide lets ignorance win. No matter if it offends me directly, or someone else, I will confront the speaker and let them know that's not ok.
7. I don't get offended personally. As an immigrant, woman, gay and person of color if I took every single potentially offensive remark seriously I wouldn't get anything done.
8. I punch them in the balls. With my mind.
9. I do speak up, but often very timidly because I feel that I'm white and therefore I don't really have any authority to lecture someone on what's racist and what isn't...
10. Generally speaking, I do not let this shit fly, because it reduces me as a person, to this non-person and it replicates the destructive discourse that makes sure that sexual minorities, racial minorities, women, people with disabilities, trans people and every intersection thereof into something other than human... And sometimes... I'm just too tired to deal with it, so I roll my eyes, make a sarcastic remark and hope the conversation moves on quickly.

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Today I'm going to look at some strategies for dealing with revision and moving a manuscript forward to the point of submission. DISCLAIMER first: These are simply small strategies that help me through the rough spots. They are by no means, THE STRATEGIES to use. In fact, if you have other suggestions, PLEASE feel free to share them! 

1. DEADLINES- Anyone who has ever written for a newspaper will tell you how useful the practice of writing to a deadline is. It teaches you discipline. It helps you get past all those little roadblocks in the way to typing your first sentence for the day. You have a deadline staring you in the face and so you must write. And somehow, miraculously, once you type that first sentence, the roadblock usually clears and the thoughts begin to flow. That inner voice that was clamoring CAN'T, CAN'T, CAN'T is silenced. 

So, give yourself a deadline. This will alter the way you think about the work. If you have all the time in the world to write, you will keep striving for perfection. I'm not saying this is a bad thing. I'm just saying it is potentially never-ending. It could go on FOREVER. 

I try to break my manuscript into manageable chunks and give myself goals for the week. As I move through successive revisions, the size of the chunks increases until I identify problem areas and focus on those. Somehow this makes the project feel more manageable. If I'm happy with the first fifty pages, I feel like I've accomplished something and it makes the work of fixing the second fifty pages feel more doable. 

When I was a student at Vermont College, Phyllis Root suggested making an agreement with a trusted friend to send her a chapter or so many pages every week. That way you have a deadline and, if you have a deadline, you will focus on polishing what you have right here and now and sending it out.

2. JOIN A WRITING GROUP AND READ YOUR WORK OUT LOUD – Have you ever noticed that it is only when you know you are considering how your work will sound to others that you honestly hear how it sounds? For some reason, each of us seems to have a little fairy godmother tucked inside who wrinkles up her nose and smiles when she hears bumps in a manuscript as if to say, don't worry, dearie. Nobody will notice. I can read a page out loud to myself countless times and never notice a glaring flaw in it. But, let me consider sharing it with a trusted listener and HORRORS! The little bump that my fairy godmother was willing to ignore has morphed into a giant pothole. 

The good news is that, by recognizing the problem, you not only have the opportunity to improve your manuscript, but, once you have fixed the problem, you develop more confidence in the quality of your work as a whole. 

3. REMIND YOURSELF THAT YOU WILL CONTINUE TO EDIT THE WORK EVEN IF IT SELLS – This is a tricky one. On the one hand, you only want to send out your very best work. So, please do not think I am suggesting you take the attitude, that's good enough. I'll fix it later. Far from it. I'm only saying that you don't necessarily need to feel that every single word of every sentence on every page is precisely the way it should always be, now and forever. AMEN. 

4. ALWAYS REMAIN OPEN TO POSSIBILITY. This is just good advice for life. It applies to writing and revision, just as it applies to ordering off the menu at a new restaurant. 

BON APPETIT! 

Now, back to work. . . .

Faculty and alums of Vermont College's MFA in Writing for Children program(VCMFAWC) are familiar with a question frequently posed by one of our own. When a visiting writer comes to town, if Trent Reedy is in the room, he is likely to ask,

            "How do you know when you've finished a book?"

It's a great question. Does anybody know the answer? 

I'm sure I don't.

Lately I've been contemplating this question a lot. I have this uncomfortable

stirring inside which tells me that I am somewhere close to completion of the novel that I've been working on for . . . oh, I don't know. Let's just say, a LONG time.

Suffice it to say, that I'm trying to figure out when it's time to say, Uncle, or Eureka or Hallelujah or Oh, _ _ _ _ or whatever the appropriate exclamation may be and send the thing off.

Trusted readers have read it. They've made wonderful suggestions. I've revised and re-visioned and re-written in response to their thoughtful comments. I have shaped and trimmed and expanded and contracted and tightened and punched up and toned down and smoothed out until my poor little writing muscles are in tatters and shreds. 

 
Am I done yet?

Please tell me yes.

But, seriously, how do you know? 

That's what I'm going to talk about this week. And, believe me, I welcome all thoughts on this subject.   For one thing, I believe the answer is probably different for every writer. As if that doesn't complicate the subject enough, I also believe the answer probably differs from project to project. So, there you go. An impossible question. Are there any guidelines? It's a question worth pondering. 

I am reminded of the scene at the end of Michael Chabon's novel, Wonder Boys, in which the pages of the poor tortured writer's ridiculously long and apparently unfinishable novel go scattering to the four corners of the earth. Well, that is one way to end the misery. But, I can't help hoping for a different outcome.  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sveK_fhIqhs  (NO.  This is not THAT scene.  It's a link to the trailer... also fun to watch.)

 Let's take a look at the bizarre and circuitous path some famous writers have taken to the finish line. Let's talk about how to know when it's time to throw caution to the wind and send that puppy out.

 One example of the odd twists and turns of the path to writing a novel comes from the experience of Josephine Humphreys whose novel Rich in Love is one of my favorites. I heard her speak shortly after the publication of her third novel, Fireman's Fair. That story, for those of you unfamiliar with the book, takes place in Charleston, South Carolina in the aftermath of a hurricane. The first sentence reads as follows,

    In his lawn chair under the Carolina sun, Rob Wyatt sat recuperating,keeping an eye on what was out there – his ruined island town, the blue yonder – as if recovery could be gained by the old southern method of sitting, mulling one's fate, watching things that don't move much.  

You see a theme already emerging, right? Notice those words ruin and recovery? And yet, get this, Humphreys did not put the hurricane in the book until after she had written the story and had it pretty well polished.  Hurricane Hugo came along well after she had started the book and so she added it to the manuscript. Et violà. Reading this novel, you cannot imagine the story sans hurricane. Take a look at these opening sentences from a review in School Library Journal:

" YA-- The hurricane that devastated much of Charleston and its neighboring islands precipitates the action of this novel. The destruction it left becomes a metaphor for the chaos in the lives of Rob Wyatt, a 32-year-old lawyer who quits his job, and his friends and family who reside on the Isle of Palms."

And yet, it was not a hurricane which precipitated the writing of this book. So, you never know. You know? What if Humphreys had stopped working on the novel before the hurricane? What if the hurricane hadn't happened when it did?

Some scholars characterize F. Scott Fitzgerald's early story, Winter Dreams, as a warm-up exercise for his masterpiece, The Great Gatsby because of the similar themes and storylines. Both works feature a young man of modest or limited means who falls in love with a golden girl from a privileged family.  The protagonist then longs to become a part of that glittering and unobtainable world. Of course, this is most likely an oversimplification of Fitzgerald's intentions, but still the similarities do suggest an artist obsessed by a certain story line or theme which he continued to explore in his work. 

Perhaps the most curious tale about the twists and turns in the path of writing concerns a book which, according to Anita Silvey's 100 Best Books for Children,  began as a "10,000-word saga" and ended up as a 101 word picture book. You guessed it. That's The Carrot Seed by Ruth Krauss. So, the next time you worry about cutting a chapter or a scene or even an entire character, think about that!

For today, let me end with a quote from Richard Brautigan collected in George Plimpton's The Writer's Chapbook in the chapter, "On Beginnings and Endings."

            "I always wanted to write a book that ended with the word mayonnaise."

Now there's one way to know when you've reached the end, although we still don't know the long and torturous path it might take to reach that word.

Until next time . . .